Reykjavík Grapevine - 01.02.2019, Page 10

New Year, same old smite. Our warriors-
in-waiting are currently nursing their
blisters after a Christmas visit to their
training camp on the surface of the
sun. After returning to terra firma
energised and refreshed with powerful
heavenly energy, Gylfi’s one-man smite
train has remained on course, even as
his manager de-rails; battle-scarred
veteran Eiður Smári is back in the fold;
and much, much more. Here’s what our
boys had to say as we enter the Chinese
Year of the Smiter.
Glorious homecoming
for brave pups
A pack of ravenous Icelandic pups
secured their places in national folk-
lore by thwarting old (sort-of) Nordic
foes Estonia and Sweden at a pair of
unfriendly match-ups in Qatar. Erik
Hamrén will take heart from the
matches, which ended 0-0 and 2-2,
respectively. Perhaps he’ll remember
them as some of his best results to
date, in light of last year’s omnisham-
bolic Nations League campaign.
21-year-old Mjällby forward Óttar
Magnús Karlsson added a second goal
to his international tally in the game
against the Swedes, while 20-year-
old Vendsyssel midfielder Jón Dagur
Þorsteinsson opened his scoring
account for Iceland. There’s life in
the old dog’s lukewarm management
tenure yet.
Cardiff longboat taking
on water
After Neil Warnock said “we'll be far
better out of the bloody thing” when
asked about his opinions
on Britain’s membership of
the EU, it seems his squad
misinterpreted the message
as being about Cardiff ’s
stint in the Premier League.
Aron Gunnarsson looked on
as the Bluebirds plunged
into the relegation zone,
taking a 3-0 spanking from
fellow stragglers Newcastle
United. Warnock will be
looking to add some fire-
power to the Cardiff ranks
to boost his side’s survival hopes as
Transfer Deadline Day looms.
Gylfi smites, even in defeat
Week by week, Everton manager Marco
Silva’s reputation crumbles like the
British defences during the Viking inva-
sion in 867 AD. Pressure continued to
mount on the Portuguese manager, who
previously held the reins at Hull City
and Watford before his current stint
with Everton, after a 2-1 loss against the
resurgent Southampton. Gylfi Sigurðs-
son slotted home a composed consola-
tion goal for the Toffees, taking his tally
to nine for the season. While this will
stand him in good stead when a new
coach arrives, Silva is pining for the
fjörd with a move to China and a stab at
the Dakar Rally on the cards.
Your defence is terrified,
Finnbo’s (still) on fire
“The Arctic Fox in the Box,” Alfreð
Finnbogason, takes his white-hot goal-
scoring form into the New Year, remain-
ing behind only super-sub freak Paco
Alcácer in the race for the much-coveted
best minutes-per-goal ratio in the
Bundesliga. Finnbo has been on target
seven times in just 11 league games this
season, accounting for over a quarter of
Augsburg’s goals. That statistic perhaps
explains their lowly league position—
they currently sit only four points above
the relegation zone. But the Fugger-
städter faithful needn’t fear—a fit and
firing Finnbo all but guarantees their
safety.
Eiður “The Glaciator”
rejoins Team Iceland
Our boys’ all-time record goalscorer,
Eiður Guðjohnsen, is back in the
national fold as U21 coach Arnar Þór
Viðarsson’s assistant. The duo are
charged with developing the next crop
of Viking warriors, some of whom could
be unleashed at the World Cup in 2022.
Inevitably, the pillars of Iceland’s recent
golden footballing age will be phased
out over the coming years—and now is
the time for the next generation of snow
leopards to take up the mantle. With
Eiður on board, the new pack surely
won’t be short of goals. Expect them to
be piking opposition heads very soon.
Follow our live-tweets on match-
days on Twitter at @rvkgrapevine.
Iceland's indomitable and unstop-
pable march to the Euro 2020 trophy
will continue throughout 2019, as
Aron, Gylfi, Jóhann Berg and the boys
smite their way through all the conti-
nents of the world, laying waste to
any team foolish enough to step into
their terrible path to glory.
#IcelandSmites
“The pillars of
Iceland’s golden
footballing age
will be phased
out over the
coming years—
now is the
time for a new
generation of
snow leopards
to leap forth.”
Chinese Year
Of The Smiter
As we settle into the new year, it’s all going off like a
firework display at Camp Smite
FOOTBALL
Words:
Greig Robertsson
Illustration:
Lóa Hlín
Hjálmtýsdóttir
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