The Arctic Times - 01.10.1941, Qupperneq 3

The Arctic Times - 01.10.1941, Qupperneq 3
THE ARCTIC TIMES 3 Introducing »Aunt Mathilda’s Corner«. This column, dear readers, is to be devoted entirely to the welfare of your minds. To dis- cuss the problems which baffle and annoy, and to seek a solu- tion. Have you a secret worry? Is your house in order? Let Aunt Matthilda help you. Address your letter to: Aunt Matthilda, c/o the Arctic Times. Already we are able to let the sunshine into minds clouded with worry and to bring smi- les of relief to faces rendered haggard and drawn by the crushing weight of a nagging consience or a domestic pro- blem unsolved. Here are brief replies to some of this week’s queries. 1. „I detest discipline in any shape or form and cannot submit myself to being or- dered about by anyone. Ha- ving recently joined the Ar- my I must try and cure my- self of these weaknesses. Can you recommend a brief course of study“? Sure. A close study of your Commanding Officer’s face when you appear on Orders. 2. „I am due to go on the next leave trip. Should I start walking straight away as I hear the boat went aground last time and I do not wish to miss my train“. No, don’t worry. This is a frequent occurence and extra time is allowed for it. 3. „Can you tell me, please, the difference between a D.F.C. and a D,S.C.?“ Approximately 25,000 ft. 4. „I intend to get up an hour before reveille each morning during the winter and go for a run in my P.T. kit.“ The M.O. knows that one, son. Try tearing up paper into little bits on Adjutant’s parade and squinting at your cap buttons. 5. „Tell me, on a move is a batman responsible for A.LL the kit of his officer?“ No, only the little bit the officer himself does not car- ry- (Many replies unavoidably held over, but do not be afraid to write). LEAVE OE EURLOUGH. Pte Smudger of the Fusiliers knocked gingerly on the door of the Sergeant Major’s hut and, hearing no reply, gently turned the handle and crept in. The Sergeant Major, occupied with his big effort of the day, the Daily Detail, was muttering quietly to himself and the Com- pany Clerk was thumping on the typewriter in tune with the less melodious noise of the storeman who was snoring peacefully on his bed, as was his usual wont. „Well, my lad“, said the Ser- geant Major, looking up from his work and smiling sweetly at the intruder, (as Company Ser- geant Major’s always do), „and what brings you here?“. „I was wondering if I could get any leave“, said the hopeful Smudger, standing first on one leg and then on the other with his hands pressed firmly a- gainst the seams of his battle- dress trousers. „Leave! Never ’eard of such thing, ’ave you, Wiggins?“, he groaned, turning towards the scrivener who had suddenly ceased his thumping and ap- peared dazed at the mention of such a curious word. „Can't say as I ever have, Sir. At least, I do remember the word being mentioned once but that was many years ago“, and he continued mournfully with his thumping. The Sergeant Major, always out to help, as Sergeant Major’s nlways are, betook himself to a shelf and, having pushed his hand through several cobwebs and disturbed a nest of new born mice, returned to his throne with a large book whose pages were stuck neatly to- gether with a thick layer of dust and dead cockroaches. „Here we are“, he said hope- fully, „we’ll see what the Company Standing Orders have to say about it“, and turning over a few pages suddenly began to read: Whereas it is deemed that a soldier of the Regular Forces who has, through no fault of his own, successfully termina- ted a period of three years in a foreign country shall, on applying in the correct manner, be liable to be sent on Leave or Furlough for a maximum period of three weeks or any such lesser period as may be from time to time determined for him by his superior officers. On considering himself worthy of the above mentioned privi- lege the soldier should at once apply to his Section Comm- ander who should then report the matter immediately to the Platoon Sergeant who should then without further delay notify the Platoon Commander. The latter officer will then see that the application is sent through the usual channels to the Chief Clerk at Brigade Headquarters when, having lain on his table for a period not exceeding seven days, it should be forwarded slowly but surely to Higher Authority in tripli- cate accompanied by Army Form one hundred and seventy six, Army Form ninety and Army Council Instruction Number sixty two as amended by Number forty nine. Higher Authority will then toss a Mark Six pattern coin to deter- mine the result. The decision, if ever made, will be despatched back again to the soldier in time to reach him exactly seventeen days after the date for which the leave was desired. „Well, that seems to be quite clear“, said the Sergeant Major pampously and on looking up to see the effect of his good advice on the private soldier discovered that the room was empty. B.L.K. The Book of Hopwood. And there was born unto John and Martha a son who was named Laurie, which means „Blonde and beautiful“, but he was not as the rose. And it came to pass that when grew to manhood he did join the tribe of Khaki and did journey forth to the Land of Ice. Now in this strange land were many Stulkas which means „Frozen Blonde“ and people of the Land of Ice did occupy themselves by fishing and love making, and in the winter it was not possible to do much fishing. After he had dwelt in this strange land for many moons Laurie did write home and did say to his Mother, „Send me chocolates for I am hungry“. When his Mother got his message, she was sorely puzzled saying to her husband, „Tis passing strange, he that is my son now likes chocolates when his taste used to be for the leg of an ox. And his Father did smile, for he knew that the maidens in the Land of Ice were fair and pleasing to the eye. Competition No. I First Prize: Kr 5 All you have to do is to rewrite the follering text with the correct spelling, sign it with your name and unit, put it into an envelope and send it, via your unit orderly room or office to the Editors, The Arctic Times, Marlborough Camp in time to reach them by 1200 hrs on Friday, 17th October, 1941 At that time all entries will be put into a bag, shaken up and placed before the Editors, who will then draw out the entries until they open the first correct solution. The owner of that solution will be forwarded the prize of Kr. 5. The correct solution will appear in next week’s issue and the name of the winner in that of the week after. Entries are limited to one per person and the decision of the Editors is final. Look out for our second competition next week. Here is what you have to rewrite with the correct spelling: It is incredably cold today allthough the sun is shineing. The leeves are begining to fall of the trees so it seams that autum has comenced which will soon be folowed by winter. Not unaturaly I hope to procede on leave during the cold wheather but this appears a remote posability. Y.M.C.A. CALLING. Open 1000 to 22 hrs. every day. Sundays at 1400 hrs. Sing Song on Wednesdays at 2030 hrs. Service on Sundays at 1945 hrs. H. GASTER. Northern Lights. As the sun dips and shadows lengthen, The colours of the Arctic night Blend and mix in strange confusion Above the mountains tipped with white. Purples, red and blues all mingle; Swirl across the mighty heights, Could there ever be more beauty, Than the wondrous Northern Lights.

x

The Arctic Times

Direct Links

Hvis du vil linke til denne avis/magasin, skal du bruge disse links:

Link til denne avis/magasin: The Arctic Times
https://timarit.is/publication/1875

Link til dette eksemplar:

Link til denne side:

Link til denne artikel:

Venligst ikke link direkte til billeder eller PDfs på Timarit.is, da sådanne webadresser kan ændres uden advarsel. Brug venligst de angivne webadresser for at linke til sitet.