Reykjavík Grapevine - 18.06.2010, Blaðsíða 45

33
The Reykjavík Grapevine
Issue 08 — 2010
Dear Editor.
Last time I wrote I did so to
warn Icelanders about the
imminent attack the country
was facing. Although none of the big
media took heed of my words, the mes-
sage got out to some via your fine pub-
lication. However, the numbers were
sadly not great enough, as one of the
last remaining fortresses of men has
now fallen into enemy hands, namely:
the good city of Reykjavík.
Many Icelanders were flabbergast-
ed by the recent municipal “elections.”
A new party lead by a local comedian
got astonishing results. Besti flok-
kurinn or “The Best Party” is the name
of the party, and our new mayor is one
Jón Gnarr. Their victory has received
international attention, as the party
seemingly emerged out of nowhere
and the whole thing was made out to
look like a joke. But to me, the only
thing funny is the smell of deceit sur-
rounding the leading candidates.
When the party came forward a
few promises were made to voters,
most of which were absurd. One of
the first promises made was that the
party would ensure that a polar bear be
added to the fauna of the local “zoo,”
currently inhabited mostly by sheep,
pigs, horses and other “domesticated”
beasts. Although I was worried by
this sinister promise, a part of me just
smiled, as it seemed to be made in the
healthy atmosphere of a genuine joke.
However, the Best Party (or the
Beast Party, as it should be named) has
decided to dismiss all their promises
as a joke except for one... and guess
which one. Yes. They ARE going to ac-
quire a polar bear and move it into the
heart of Reykjavík where it will reside
as a next-door neighbour to the “Fam-
ily Garden” visited by approximately
50.000 children yearly.
In my darkest nightmares I could
not have foreseen the cunning way in
which The Beast would penetrate this
great fortress of mankind. The main-
stream media is still ignoring my mes-
sage, but those who have opened their
eyes to the conspiracy of the Beast
should not be in any doubt. This is the
evil doing of the Knut, the White Spawn
of Berlin.
My warnings have hitherto been
in vain, and the cunning plan of The
Beast Lord has been set in motion via
the democratically elected Beast Party.
Now my worst fears have become a
reality. The White One will get his foot-
hold in one of the last havens of men,
Reykjavík.
Let me remind you of the graveness
of our situation. Only last year, two po-
lar bears did their best to destroy us
by attacking Iceland from the north.
Luckily our defences held. But just as
I said then, and will say again: I knew
that more trouble would be ahead. As a
fervent fighter against animal influence
in the world of men, I knew they would
return. Knut, the latest successor to the
throne of Hell, would certainly not give
up and surely I was right.
With the media on his side, Knut
the White has managed to do what
his predecessor Keiko the Dark failed
to. Break Iceland’s capital fortress by
planting a demon in the heart of our
land. One of his own. A polar bear.
Jón Gnarr, our new major, has a
shady history in show business. La-
belled an “anarchist,” Jón got his
middle name changed from Gunnar
to Gnarr, presumably to resemble the
snarl of a flesh-eating demon. How he
fell into the service of the Beast I do not
yet know in detail, but my investigation
has led me to believe that he became
tainted by the Beast’s spell in April of
last year.
Just like many other notorious lead-
ers—Woodrow Wilson, Herbert Hoover,
Richard Nixon and George W. Bush to
name a few—Jón was enlisted to The
Beast’s human army by a terrier puppy.
This puppy calls himself Tobbi, and al-
though Jón was at the time considered
the most talented and successful actor
in Iceland, suddenly his eye started tilt-
ing towards politics.
Coincidence? I think not.
Political commentators have yet
to understand what happened to Jón.
The public has yet to realise that Mr.
Gnarr is not the actor or the comedian
he used to be, and his actions are not
intended to bring joy and laughter to
anyone. He is possessed. He is pos-
sessed by the worst of evils. It is dif-
ficult to come to terms with, but he has
enrolled himself to the service of Knut,
the White Spawn of Berlin.
Maybe when our society has crum-
bled under the paw of The White Bear,
people will remember my words. The
same people that dismissed my letters
as rambling of a madman. But I will tell
you this: The day a polar bear enters
the heart Reykjavík will be the day hu-
manity lost the war against The Beast.
Mark my words.
The Beast will rule over all of man-
kind, just like it almost did when the
demon bitch Blondi ruled Germany.
May God bless us all.
Regarding The Recent Elections
Opinion | Dr. Berthold Manz
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