Reykjavík Grapevine - 13.11.2015, Blaðsíða 6

Reykjavík Grapevine - 13.11.2015, Blaðsíða 6
6 The Reykjavík Grapevine Issue 1 — 2011 Tel: +354 511 2600 · info@bustravel.is · bustravel.is ALL SEASON S! Glacier Lagoon Jökulsárlón – Day tour – This great tour takes us along the impressive south shore of Iceland to the extraordinary Glacier Lagoon. Availability . . . . . . . Saturdays Pick up starts . . . . . 07:00am Duration. . . . . . . . . . 14 hours Price. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18.500 ISK I C E L A N D 4 D U M M I E S Fart | Brrrrrraaaapp! 6 Th Reykjavík Grapevine Issue 17 — 2015 This past month sure has been a busy one where immigration is con- cerned. Over these past few weeks, we saw a Vietnamese couple ac- cused of having a sham marriage (an accusation that was revealed to be way off the mark), and the impending deportations of two asylum-seeking families: one from Albania, and the other from Syria. That’s right, Syria: the country from whence Iceland intends to voluntarily bring in an un- told number of refugees. At the time of writing, the two families are still in a state of limbo, but at least the Vietnamese couple had their mar- riage validated as legitimate and real and based on love—by bureaucrats working in an immigration office. Speaking of international head- lines, one story that spread like wildfire was Minister of Finance Bjarni Benediktsson proposing to members of the Independence Party (which he chairs) that every Icelander be paid about 30,000 ISK (about $230) from the proposed sale of the State’s recently acquired bank, Íslandsbanki. The government handing out cash might make for fine image macro and Iceland-Meme material, until you consider that this money represents 5% of the govern- ment’s soon-to-be 100% share in the bank, divided by 320,000. Kind of like how if you and your buddies all chipped in to buy a keg, and then the guy who brought the keg back of- fered everyone a single red Solo cup of beer, but kept the rest for himself. Not such a great deal now, is it? The IKEA Christmas goat re- turned to our fair shores to grace the property in front of the store’s By Paul Fontaine NEWS IN BRIEF Continues Over... Some Iceland Things That Scare Americans By The American Intern Letters that don’t look like our letters Maybe ‘ð’ and ‘þ’ both make sounds we can easily pronounce, but those sym- bols still look weird and alien, almost Lovecraftian. And make us uncomfort- able. Like public nudity. The lack of Fritos Doritos are a poor substitute and you know it, Iceland. I want my corn chips and I want them slightly curled. Also, am I really complaining about this? Wow, being American sure is, uh, something. European fashion How do you dance in those black super thick-soled heel things? This is a serious question. I have a pair and I fell once. Card readers, apparently? Some customer at my workplace: “I don’t understand you people or your card ma- chines.” Sorry, Californian. This is one of those situations where ‘you people’ doesn’t cut it. Just stick the damn thing in and be done with it already. Some people have work in the morning. Accessible healthcare Meep. Ghosts Though, those are almost always scary. "Fertugsaldri" Ragnar Egilsson Explains Some Words! When referring to a person’s age (the verb is “dilapidating”), we sometimes refer to the decade of existence that person is currently struggling through instead of using their exact age. Howev- er, the name of the age bracket is always dictated by that decade’s upper limit. So, if you’re 21, people say you’re on “þrí- tugsaldur” (“on your thirties”?), and if you’re 31, you’re now proudly on “fer- tugsaldur” (“on your forties”???). We do this because we all hate one another and our language is an unholy amalgam of silence and passive-aggression. #AIRWAVES15 DEEP ANALYSIS A POEM BY JÓN ÖRN LOÐMFJÖRÐ spleen the spleen is large and has the right high response like a mud when you carve into the spleen you get mud like from a road construction that hangs from the slipper field towards empty beer can where I sit with a banging empty head OMG FREE COOL STUFF! WOW! Iceland Whatever CDs up for grabs We were visited the other day by Theory Of Whatever giant indie-label boss man Bryan Riebeek, who was in town for some music festival. He brought along his latest release: a nice ol' 14-track compilation CD, illustrated by FM Bel- fast’s mighty Lóa and featuring a bunch of great Icelandic music. It’s great, wow. And guess what: you can win one for no reason. Yup, the first few folks who drop us a line at secretparty@grapevine.is are getting that limited edition comp 4 Fr€€! #WOW! (If you miss out, you can get one at www.tow.is. They’re goddamn cheap.)
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