Reykjavík Grapevine - 25.08.2017, Blaðsíða 64

L I F E , T R AV E L & E N T E R TA I N M E N T I N I C E L A N D
Issue 15 × 2017
Aug 25 – Sep 7
www.grapevine.is

LAST WORDS
Printed
Cocaine for
the Rich
Words: Halldór Armand Ásgeirsson
Photo: Art Bicnick
More cocaine, please, and fewer books. That’s
how we like it. Yes, let the good times roll.
Decadence is hip again. Finally! It was only
gone for a few years, but god, how long that felt.
The uniform Range Rovers are back; the vodka-
drinking, suit-wearing teenagers are back;
fluid capital and ISDA agreements are back.
The influx of cocaine into Iceland is break-
ing all records and book sales are down a third
since 2008. This can only mean one thing: the
situation is excellent! We might actually reach
the point where a decent novel in a Reykjavik
bookstore costs more than a gram of coke from
a 21-year-old on Facebook. What a milestone
that would be. The government should tax art
and culture even more. A book with interest-
ing ideas easily costs 50 euros today. Why stop
there? Make it 150. I thought that was the goal
when taxes on books and food were raised, and
taxes on electronics cut. Tax culture and food
a bit more and maybe we can eliminate all fees
levied on smart devices.
What a beautiful world it would be, what a
glorious time to be free!
All joking aside, I get it. As a tyrant, I’d do
the same. Books are dangerous. Something in
their nature makes them enemies of power.
Two minds meet to discuss ideas in silence. To
people in power this should not be promoted
(the same cannot be said of TVs and smart-
phones). There’s a reason why books have been
banned and burned throughout the ages. Pric-
ing is the more modern way to keep ideas un-
der control. In Iceland, books and alcohol are
kept extremely expensive. For some obscure
reason, there seems to exist a silent agree-
ment, regardless of who’s in government, that
these things are not for poor people.
I look forward to the day when my book
dealer—an unshaven man in a trench coat—
shows up at my door with two smoking hatchet
men, telling me I owe him money. I’ll be thin,
pale and shaking. “I’ll get the money, Bergþór,
I swear, just give me one more fix, something
Russian from the late 19th century, you know
I’m good for it!”.
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