Reykjavík Grapevine - mar. 2020, Síða 8

Icelanders don’t really believe in elves.
It’s just a silly myth. That said, we don’t
mess with them either. Perhaps, for
some, this might sound like a contra-
diction, but in Iceland, we know that only
an idiot trifles with the things he doesn't
understand. In fact, Icelanders respect
elves—which, again, we absolutely don’t
believe in— so much that oftentimes
the road systems have been completely
altered for their benefit. Here is one of
many examples. Not that it matters of
course. Elves don’t exist. Totally.
Don’t f”#$ with the elves
Hegranes is an area in Skagafjör!ur, in
the North of Iceland. There lies the road-
Sau!árkróksbraut, or route 75, which
meanders through an outcrop called
Tröllaskar!—“Troll’s Pass” in English.
In the 70s, construction workers were
busy laying the road, when a medium
called and told them that whatever they
did, they could not bomb the cliffs, as this
would anger the elves. Unfortunately, for
both the psychic and the elves—not that
they exist—the builders needed to do so
in order to make progress on the road.
Mysterious malfunctioning
This medium turned out to be Hafsteinn
Björnsson, who, at the time, was a
psychic superstar in Iceland. What made
the phone call even more odd was the
fact that the road construction was not
widely known about nor considered
controversial… so, how did Hafsteinn
know about it? Shortly after Hafsteinn’s
warning, another medium contacted the
Icelandic road administration—that’s
when shit got serious.
As the construction continued
near Tröllaskar!, bulldozers began to
malfunction in mysterious ways. This
was obviously due to the elves (who
don’t exist) and these spooky setbacks,
combined with the medium’s warnings,
made the contractors decide to halt their
work on the pass and completely change
the route of the road. Best not anger the
obviously not real supernatural crea-
tures, of course.
Safest road in the country
As a result, Sau!árkróksbraut is quite
odd. But the elves, which we 100% do
not believe in, are thought to protect
the strange road in gratitude for our
consideration. There has never been an
incident recorded on the road (according
to the source from 2016), making it one
of Iceland's safest. Of course, this has
nothing to do with elves either. We are
just excellent drivers.
The Elven Effect
A short revision of Iceland's safest road
8 The Reykjavík Grapevine
Issue 03— 2020
Elín Ey - Waterloo
This acoustic cover of
an ABBA classic lends
the tune a whole
new tone. While the
original is fast and
upbeat, this version is
slow and melancholy.
I honestly prefer this
one, and that’s no
small feat for any
cover of an ABBA
song. SPO
Tómas Welding -
Lifeline
Here’s one for the
ukelele lovers or
Kings Of Leon fans
looking to expand
your musical library
to more of the same
stu%. This is the music
for you. If I’m honest,
I’m trying to hate
this song, but it’s just
too catchy and easy
to listen to. I’ll be
humming this one all
day. SPO
Dirb - Blow Out (feat.
MSEA)
This is good.
Electronica with
heavy bass and an
eerie undertone,
making for an
unsettling feeling
that is undercut by
overtly positive lyrics.
But then, there is so
much going on in this
track that it’s easy
to lose track of the
lyrics. SPO
Seint - Einn Tveir #rír
Finally, a song for the
furries. Grapevine
has been closely
watching Seint’s
evolution over the
past two years, and
this guy has morphed
into a solid pop
machine. The song is
EDM with a cool twist
and some basic furry
violence. Seint can’t
really go wrong and is
always entertaining
and interesting. VG
Da!i og Gagnamagni!
- Think About Things
Da!i og Gagnamagni!
will be Iceland’s
contenders at the
2020 Eurovision
Song Contest being
held in Rotterdam in
May. Da!i became a
superstar in Iceland
a'er he ended up in
second place in the
same contest some
years ago. The song is
best described as a
combination of disco
and nerdiness. That’s
it. Also, fun fact, Da!i
is a half-giant. VG
Hrím - Ljómi
An experimental folk
band that always
strives for the
depth which is why
they have always
interested us. The
song Ljómi (Glow) has
a heavy beat backing
the crystal clear
voice of Ösp Eldjárn,
combining everything
that is great about
Hrím. Definitely the
most interesting folk
band in town right
now. VG
Jónbjörn - Brot 04
From the darkest
recesses of Berlin's
lil' Reykjavik
neighbourhood
comes Jónbjörn,
with an EP of tracks
that straddle quirky
and fun while still
also being gloomy
but danceable.
JB's storied career,
starting Laga%e Tales
and concquering the
local house scene
is building up to a
Teutonic Techno
crescendo. SP
GRAPEVINE
PLAYLIST
JUST SAYINGS COMIC
Blessed with a big head? Tough
luck. As Icelanders say, “People
with big heads are stupid!” Yes,
not our most gracious saying, we
know. Basically, it means that one
should not judge others by their
appearances. For instance, one
should not make a conclusion on
another’s intelligence by the size of
their head. That is what the saying
is supposed to mean, but it’s proba-
bly one of the most misunderstood
idioms in Iceland. On a personal
note, it’s excellent news for the
journalist that wrote this text, as he
has a hideously big head and ridicu-
lously small body. We can’t all win
the gene-lottery, you know. VG
ICELANDIC
SUPERSTITIONS
Words:
Valur Grettisson
Photo:
Adobe Stock
First
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stór“