Reykjavík Grapevine - 07.04.2006, Blaðsíða 4

Sportacus
Many thanks for bringing up the
subject of the LazyTown invasion.
I do realize that there are things out
there that may have a more negative
influence on my kids, but there are
few things as eminent and persuasive
for them as this LazyTown craze
these days. After each episode, I
have to spend hours on playing down
expectations about McDonalds ham-
burgers (ad running just before the
show), pink plastic shoes and vita-
mins with aspartame that no healthy
and well fed kid will benefit from.
And what’s with Stephanie’s dress?
Pass her a few Lato’s to buy a longer
one.
Hanna
Hanna,
Birkir’s piece in the last issue, Hey
Sportacus, Leave My Kids Alone,
brought up some key issues of the Lazy-
Town discussion, issues that were echoed
in the Icelandic-language media--
ahem, without any citation or reference
to our own writer, specifically in a
lengthy column in Fréttablaðið. This
is an excellent service the Grapevine
provides Fréttablaðið readers.
But let us return to LazyTown—yes,
there are creepy aspects, and it is good
to mention them. I guess I really don’t
understand the argument fully… what
television show do you think should raise
your children?
Love Your Online
Reykjavík Grapevine
Thank you for a wonderful online
publication! Really enjoy it. Will be
visiting your neck of the woods for
several days come this weekend.
Can’t wait to experience it. Your
articles are doing well to prepare us
for what may come.
Best regards to you and your staff on
a very professional effort to inform
the people.
Warmly,
Loredana :)
We do our best, which is to say that Paul
Nikolov, Gunnar Hrafn Jónsson and
Sveinn Birkir Björnsson get the news up
by noon, Icelandic time, each day, while
I drink coffee and babble incoherently.
I do believe that the Grapevine will
prepare you better for all aspects of Rey-
kjavík than any other publication.
How Dare You!
I was reading you latest copy of
(G)rapevine issue and came across
a very offensive comment. You said
that Brain Police (A very bad band)
had a rhythm section that would
make RUSH jealous!!! I find that
very offensive because Rush are gods
among men and shouldn’t be put
in a sentence with a gay band like
Brain Police. I should sue you, but
we are not in America so I won’t
do anything. Except hate your lame
magazine for many Aeons to come,
you aging hippie liberal douche.
Sincerely:
Your hateful non-friend - Ape Shaw
Dear Ape,
I’m sorry for offending you. I was refer-
ring to the fat-ass Canadian Led Zep-
pelin cover band Rush, not whatever
band inspired your devotion. As for my
age and political leanings- I think you’re
confusing me for another Bart. I’m the
29-year-old Democrat who would vote
for Bill Clinton for a third term, if pos-
sible, putting me in the moderate camp;
I am not the aging hippie who did those
dirty things to your mom at the Jerry
Brown campaign rally and put them
on that More Reasons to Hate Bush
website. Glad to have you as a reader.
Regarding lawsuits, the press is more
open to lawsuits in Iceland than they are
in America, so sue away. You could be
the next Bubbi.
Letter to the Editor
Goodbye Iceland
I am returning to my home, America.
I will miss your serene atmosphere.
The simplicity I encounter in your
small towns. The smell of the ocean
which greets me in the early morn-
ing. I now understand the awe of
Esja. When my life is troubled I will
miss the comfort she brings me. The
green hills and calming sound of
water falling on rocks. This landscape
has forever changed me. It will be
the place my mind returns to when I
need tranquillity. It took some time
for my instant gratification personal-
ity to accept the type of silent friend-
ship you offered. I eventually learned
that you show love by just being.
Constant. Strong. Like the old stones
that dot the countryside like remind-
ers of the past. I feel connected to
something everlasting. My footprints
on untouched land. The purity of
your spirit.
My grandmother once told me it
was better to say nothing unless you
have nothing of substance to say. I
see beauty in the small talk which
fills your days. I’ve learned that the
weather talk , the token “áttu kaffi?” ,
and the endless discussions of where
the price per kilo on lamb is cheapest,
keeps us connected. I once found
quite baffling the unwillingness to
discuss things of importance like
emotions or feelings . Yet with time
I realized that life just is. Time passes
like water over black stones, polished
smooth by eons of small talk.
I am glad I am leaving before the
disgusting emptiness of consumer-
ism along with the nauseating smell
of capitalism become rampant and
run over this land like blood. Like
a plague. It’s begun. You do see the
signs. It is a hard thing to point your
finger at, but I would urge you to
grind to a screeching halt the pro-
gression of your simple life to a life
filled with meaningless objects, and
the glimmer of a better life of more
money hanging over the mouths of
hungry, tired, bitter people, with no
hope. That is America. You don’t
want that. Pay attention to your own
politics. They are leading you like
a herd of sheep. Iceland is unique
beauty. Save it. You don’t need big
buildings to be beautiful or power
for that matter. Money doesn’t make
a nation happy. Be happy that your
children enjoy a freedom which a
child in America will never know. Be
satisfied that when you are sick you
can go to the doctor. Be happy that
you don’t have to become hard and
cold to suffering around you. Selfish-
ness and greed are enough to corrupt
the innocent. Read this paper. It is
the one place you are getting non-
slanted journalism. Turn your TV
off. Throw your Fréttablaðið out.
And start talking about what matters!
B.R. Neal
Dear B.R.,
Oh. Now that’s the kind of hippie talk
that Rush devotee Ape Shaw loathes. He
says aeon, you say eon.
Anyway, we get loads of these Goodbye,
Iceland, letters, and the authors of these
letters don’t call us douche bags. They
often give extremely condescending
and sanctimonious advice to the noble
savages of Iceland, and warn against
becoming… whatever the authors are.
SOUR GRAPES
Complaints, criticism, suggestions, praise, money, anything at all: Contact letters@grapevine.is or send
your mail to: The Reykjavík Grapevine, Faxagata 2, Faxaskála við Faxaport, 101 Reykjavík.
LULU EIGHTBALL