Reykjavík Grapevine - 14.08.2015, Qupperneq 4

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LOVELIEST LETTER
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This Issue's Most
Awesome Letter!
On Aug 12, 2015, at 8:58 PM,
Ana Maria wrote:
Hi! I'm a freelance journalist
and I would like to do a story for
the british press about the baby
seal fed to the foxes situation. I
know your magazine has done
some articles on this subject.
Hey Ana,
thanks for writing.
Answers inline.
- I understood that the Zoo
staff has(or had) an autumn
barbeque where they sacrifice
and eat animals from the zoo. Is
this true?
Yes, every year at Ma-
bon—the mid-harvest festival
of the autumn equinox—the
zoo staff dons its ceremonial
robes and engages in ritual
killings of animals that have
proven worthy (during the
Zoo's extensive Summer Tri-
als) or especially annoying
(or come from a tasty lin-
eage). Once the slaughter has
peaked, they bathe themselves
in blood as the animal flesh
cooks to a tasty, succulent
texture in the Zoo's fire pit-
altar.
- Why do they choose to eat
them instead of releasing them
into the wild?
It's not so much a mat-
ter of choice, as it is one of
common sense. First of all,
The Zookeepers would not
dare evoke the wrath of Veles,
the autumn god (we all know
what happened to Perun)
by negging on their secret,
sacred, sacrificial vows.
Furthermore, the chosen ani-
mals are particularly vicious
and tasty, and would wreak
great havoc over the people of
Iceland should they be freed
from their restraints and let
run amok. Lastly, being sacri-
ficed to Veles is traditionally
considered a great honour
among the animals, one The
Zookepers would not dare
deprive them of.
Also, they are very tasty
animals.
- Do you know what types of
animals they eat at the bar-
beque?
Here is a brief list, provid-
ed by the Zookeepers' Union:
Things we eat at the bar-
beque:
-The hart, the roebuck, the
fallow deer, the wild goat, the
pygarg, the wild ox, and the
chamois.
-Generally every beast that
parteth the hoof, and cleaveth
the cleft into two claws, and
cheweth the cud among the
beasts.
-All that are in the waters, all
that have fins and scales.
-All clean birds

Things we do not eat at the
barbeque:
-Abominable things.
-Animals that chew the cud,
or them that divide the cloven
hoof; as the camel, and the
hare, and the coney.
-The swine, because it divi-
deth the hoof, yet cheweth not
the cud.
-Whatsoever from the waters
that hath not fins and scales.
-The eagle, the ossifrage, the
ospray.
-The glede, the kite, the vul-
ture.
-Every raven.
-The owl, the night hawk, the
cuckow.
-The little owl, and the great
owl, and the swan.
-The pelican, and the gier
eagle, and the cormorant.
-And the stork, and the heron,
and the lapwing, and the bat.
-Every creeping thing that
flieth.
- What are the activists plans
related to this issue?
Resistance is futile.
Thank you for bringing a bit of
light upon this story.
Ana
Say your piece, voice your
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