Reykjavík Grapevine - 04.12.2009, Síða 28

Going home from Iceland for
Christmas? visiting Iceland
over the holidays and looking
for presents to bring home?
Worry no longer, Grapevine is
here to help.
1. for THe musIC fan
The Icelandic music scene is bubbling,
and a record is always a good gift. If you
are looking for something special—not
to mention cheap and environmentally
friendly—the recycling centre shop
Góði Hirðirinn (Fellsmúli 28) sells
second hand vinyl for 200–400 ISK
(also try Kolaportið and Lucky Vinyl
on Hverfisgata for more “select” LPs).
How about Icelandic Christmas carols
or nostalgic folk songs? Perhaps a bit of
Vilhjámur Vihljámsson for that special
someone?
2. for a frIenD—WHen your
Luggage Is fuLL anD your BanK
aCCounT emPTy
The Icelandic Opal candy boxes are
small, cheap (209 ISK in Bonus, even
cheaper at the airport) and come in
Christmas colours of green and red. They
are stylish enough for the fancypants
young and creative, and you can pump
up their street cred with stories of your
adventures in the 101 bars pouring the
alcoholic shot variety with hot blondes of
all genders.
3. for THe furry PaL
Perhaps an insult towards Icelanders’
taste buds, but the family cat back home
will be in ecstasy munching down on
the locals’ favourite snack, harðfiskur.
Several sizes, shapes and prices, available
at grocery stores, f lea market and on the
airport on your way outta here.
4. for THe sIngLe frIenD
Iceland is currently a budget destination,
but there is one item that is a bargain
beyond the rest: The pregnancy test. In
my native Finland, doubts regarding
your menstrual cycle can cost you
dearly—at least 5 euro, easily up to 20.
Here, the budget test is yours for 500 ISK
or so (2,5 euro). You share a bit of local
social-culture with this present too—
accidental pregnancies are a popular
pastime in the country, and the number
of young mothers is particularly high.
Probably works best for female friends.
5. for moTHer or
granDmoTHer
Icelandic wool is great—and, at 300 ISK
or so per ball—a bargain buy. With luck,
the present may end up coming back
to you in the shape of a pair of socks,
mittens, hat or a scarf.
6. for THe one In True
CHrIsTmas sPIrITs
Are you or one of your friends ready to
turn the other cheek? Why not open an
account at the brand new Arion Bank,
previously New Kaupthing, previously
Kaupthing. Arion “offers you the key to
business on the Iceland Stock Exchange
(ICEX), as well as all major international
markets.” And the custody account is
available to those without the Icelandic
kennitala. As a bonus, the new visual
identity even has a nice Christmassy
star-what better to lift the holiday spirits?
This present, though, may not be the
kind that keeps on giving.
7. for THe HeaLTH freaK famILy
memBer WHen you WanT
revenge
Now is your chance to have your revenge
for all those mornings as a child when
you had to swallow the disgusting cod
liver oil. Lýsi is an Icelandic product that
will have the receiver think of you every
morning. It comes in various shapes and
forms, and is available in most grocery
stores and pharmacies. It’s also pretty
healthy, we hear.
8. for a CHILD or someone
LearnIng ICeLanDIC
The Skrímsli-series by Áslaug Jónsdottir,
Kalle Güettler and Rakel Heimsdal
features five excellent books about the
adventures and daily quarrels of the
big monster and the little monster.
Cool visuals, good lessons and plenty
of humour—suits both children and
those that wish to but don’t yet speak the
glorious language of Iceland.
Xmas | Shopping
sarI PeLTonen sruLI reCHT
The reykjavík grapevine Xmas special spectacular 2009
Issue 18
12
Santa’s Best Helper
1
4
7
2
5
7
3
6
8
The lights went up this week
in Reykjavík. This holiday
season is nigh... and the
darkness is here. For the next
three months green energy will illuminate
tired trees, sea-bitten windows and
what is left of our optimism. Being my
fourth Christmas here, these lights now
symbolise something else entirely. They
are the silent warning that the biggest
annual greed swindle is about to kick off.
It’s taxing time.
These lights cast an acidic glow onto
a group of counteractive regulations at
the offices of Tollstjóri, the Directorate
of Customs. Among other things, they
collect your VAT, taxes on property,
national and municipal income, and
automobiles and roads.
In the “among other things” bracket
is the perplexing tax on posted gifts and
personal items, product samples, and
the tax on shipping costs. And let’s not
forget the charge for customs to open our
parcels to see what’s inside. Or the extra
10% VAT that is charged on top of those
charges.
Example: Let’s say you order an
umbrella online from France because
you can’t get the one you want here. The
umbrella costs 20€, and shipping is 8€.
So that’s a cost of 28€.
Now add import tax. Today 28€ is
5,153.43 ISK. Multiply this by 24.5% and
you get 6416.02 ISK. Add another 10%
VAT and you have 7057.62. Grand total so
far: 38.35 €. That’s right. Almost double
the cost of the umbrella. And finally, for
the privilege of receiving this parcel and
bill, you will be charged by Iceland Post
an additional 450 ISK. If you are importing
things you intend to sell, no matter how
small the quantities, there are further
mind-boggling regulations and charges
that I won’t go into here.
Now let’s suppose the doe-eyed
customs agent handling your package
fails to locate the invoice clearly displayed
on the outside of the box. Your parcel
will arrive a minimum three days later,
complete with a request for proof of
purchase or ironclad evidence that it is a
gift (because even gifts are taxed if they
are valued at over 2000 ISK... 10€).
Let me be clear. I have no gripe with
protectionism. Local industry in a country
as small as this should be protected. But
here where not much is being produced,
and you can’t really get anything you
need... why tax me on a replacement
piece for my phone? Why is there high
tax on items you cannot buy here? When
individuals and small business owners
are charged disproportionate fees to
import something that is otherwise
unavailable here, the only logical outcome
is circumvention of the law. Which makes
outlaws of the wrong people. Make no
mistake about it. The import duties here
are unfair and outrageous. All you are
protecting is the monopolies.
“Any information, how little as it
might seem, can be valuable to the
customs office in the fight against illegal
import. If you have any information about
smuggling please call us at (354) 552
8030 or send us an email at smygl@tollur.
is”
How does “no” sound?
When I was a kid my family was
involved with a charity that would
hide religious articles in the lining of
coats before sending them to Jews in
communist Russia. Living here puts
me, and you, on the other side of that
curtain. The incompetent Stasi vultures
that sift and pick through each and
every package, delaying and damaging
goods and invading people’s personal
and business life, and who then having
the gall to charge us for it… it’s a blatant
infringement of human rights.
I complain every time I am charged.
Frustrated and furious, I asked the
Tollstjóri agents how often they received
complaint calls like mine. “All the time
actually. But we can’t do anything about
it.”
Finally, I lodged a formal complaint and
was put through to one Svanhvít Reith,
Tollstjóri’s lawyer. While sympathetic, she
claimed she was powerless to act.
“It is like this in every country,” she
explained. Vinir, Íslendingar, landsmenn,
... it is not. No other country in the world
will do this to you. Australia, for example,
has 10% import duty tax, but in twenty
years of living there I paid tax only once
on the import of a personal item. For
years I have been exporting products on
a weekly basis and again, no complaints
or charges in any country but Iceland.
Icelanders are being heavily taxed for
something that is necessary for survival.
The powers that be are kicking you when
you’re struggling to get back on your
feet. It’s unclear who is being protected
with this tax on umbrellas and birthday
presents. Over the course of the many
arguments I have had with Tollstjóri, the
majority of customs agents admit outright
how destructive and absurd these “laws”
are. But they still charge me anyway.
Post office attendants apologise to me
in embarrassment of this setup, advising
me to boycott the tax by refusing to buy
things from overseas, drink alcohol or buy
petrol. Perhaps they are right.
So this month, when the gifts start
trickling in from abroad, and you meander
down to the post office to pay tax on
them... go and do something else too. Go
call Svanhvít. Stand in front of parliament.
And bring your pots and pans.
Xmas | Shopping
Protecting The Monopolies
WOMEN´S SHELTER
tel. 5611205
Merry Taxmas