Reykjavík Grapevine - 10.03.2017, Page 62

Ólafur Darri
Words: Nanna Dís Árnadóttir
Hey Nanna,
Am stuck inside watching ‘Trapped’
on Netflix in honour of the Snowpo-
calypse and wondering if I can get
pregnant just looking at Óli Darri?
THAT BEARD! *Drools.
- Best, Thirsty
Hey Thirsty,
Girl, anything's possible.
- Nanna
Hey Nanna,
So what's your verdict,
pineapple on pizza—yay or nay?
- Pizzaface
Comrade Pizzaface,
Last week Iceland's Ministry of Plenty
liberated the people by a decree stipu-
lating that pineapple on pizza was dou-
bleplusungood. Comrades and proles
are asked to report any persons eating
unorthodox pizza toppings to The Min-
istry of Love for thoughtcrimes. In lieu
of pineapple on pizza, Icelanders can
choose from toppings such as Victory
Cheese and Victory Ham. Rations of Vic-
tory Cheese will henceforth be increased
to 20 grammes per week, instead of 30
grammes. FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
- Comrade Nanna of the Outer Party.
p.s. Thanks for being like the fifth per-
son to email me about pizza toppings this
week, forcing me to address this issue.
Hey Nanna,
I have reservations for Dill and I'm a lit-
tle nervous about the dress code? I kind
of hate putting on airs. Is it a dressy
dress up kind of place or can I just
go in jeans and a t-shirt (preferred)?
- Country Casual
Hey Country Casual,
Don't be nervous man, just don't look
like trash. The effort the chefs at Dill
make for your culinary enjoyment is
fucking monumental. They just won a
Michelin star for fuck's sake. The
least you can do is iron a shirt.
- Nanna
WEEKLY NANNA: gpv.is/nanna
Do you want to ask Nanna a question? Go ahead, but
continue at your peril. Shoot her an email on nanna.
arnadottir(at)gmail.com or tweet her using
@NannaArnadottir
Ancient tales tell of a whale monster,
known as lyngbakur, that has the ap-
pearance of an island covered with a
growth of heather. Lyngbakur is the
second largest of all sea creatures,
its size only exceeded by the hafgúfa.
Örvar-Oddr and Vignir encountered
a lyngbakur during their search for
Ögmundr, killer of Eyþjófr. Their men
believed it to be an island covered with
heather, and several of them attempt-
ed to explore its surface, despite the
warnings of Örvar-Oddr and Vignir.
The creature then disappeared into
the sea, taking all the men with it.
Few tales of the lyngbakur have
been told in Iceland in recent times.
An exception is the tale of brother and
sister Magnús and Brandþrúður, chil-
dren of “Cleft Palate” Benóný of Glet-
tinganes in the county of Múlasýsla,
both of whom were considered upright
and honest. One spring as they were
out fishing, they let their boat drift
south along the peninsula, her holding
the fishing line. As they came closer to
the tidal race, they saw a large creature
protruding from the water surface. It
was shaped like a jellyfish and the size
of a small islet or island. Its upper half
resembled earth covered with heather.
They had ventured close to it when
they realised that the creature extend-
ed further below the surface, so they
hurried back and away from it. Some
believe that what they encountered
was a lyngbakur.
Sigfús Sigfússon, Íslenzkar þjóðsögur og
sagnir V, p. 139-140.
MONSTER OF THE MONTH
SMJÖRFLUGA
Lyngbakur
Heather Back
"Monster of the Month" is a spin off of
'The Museum of Hidden Beings', by artist
Arngrímur Sigurðsson. He delved into
Iceland´s mythological history, taking
creature encounters from across the
centuries and bringing them to life
through painting in an act of cre-
ative cryptozoology. Find the
book at bookstores, or order
it online at arngrimur.com.
62 The Reykjavík Grapevine
Issue 03 — 2017
DON'T ASK NANNA ABOUT
West-Iceland