Reykjavík Grapevine - 06.05.2016, Síða 6

Reykjavík Grapevine - 06.05.2016, Síða 6
www.bustravel.is info@bustravel.is +354 511 2600 Daily guided bus tours Golden Circle Tours Glacier Lagoon Southern Iceland Into the Glacier Figures Don't Lie Number of terms to which current President Ólafur Ragnar Grímsson will have been elected if he wins again Iceland's current ranking for longest-serving non-royal heads of state The President's monthly salary The number of people running for President of Iceland (at the time of this writing). There's no English word for: The word of the issue is frek(ur). This is a very useful word when describing everyday behavior. Frekur describes people who act with a combination of pushi- ness, stubbornness and obnox- iousness. Often this is used to describe bosses, teachers, or fel- low motorists. In a sentence: “Bílaumferð á Íslandi er best lýst sem 'survival of the frekast'.” (“Car traffic in Iceland is best described as ‘sur- vival of the frekast’”— an actual quote from an Icelander.) SHARE: gpv.is/frekur frek(ur) THIS ISSUE'S ISSUE Puffin Shops FOR It seems there is nothing Iceland's Marx-loving dirt-munching contingent hate more than someone else's success. This was the case when we put all our eggs in the heavy industry basket; it was the case when we put all our eggs in the banking and finance basket; and it's the case again as we put all our eggs in the tourism basket. Nothing is good enough for these people. Here's the thing: people don't like choices very much. Sure, you could in- stitute some kind of Stalinist planned economy where no two shops are ever allowed to sell the same thing, but how would that be good for the economy? The invisible hand of the market is gen- tly embracing Iceland once again, and there is nothing tourism's critics would love more than to snatch the country from its grasp. Everyone knows that all tourists in Iceland want to buy the same things: sweaters, cute little puffins, rocks made into inexplicable jewelry, and anything with the Icelandic flag stamped on it. This is a scientific fact. That there are hundreds of shops around the country all selling these things isn't ominous; it's progress. Face facts, guys. Puffin shops are good for Iceland, and good for tourists. If puffin shops are so bad, how come there's so many of them? Check MATE, commies. AGAINST Puffin shops are slowly but surely re- placing some special locally run busi- nesses downtown that in some cases have been cultural institutions for de- cades. One entrepreneur after the other seems ready to sell out our history for quick cash. If this trend continues, we're looking at not only a burst economic bubble; we could be seeing the end of Iceland as we know it. As such, I propose we “pull a Bhu- tan”—starting charging astronomi- cal sums of money for a tourist visa to Iceland, no matter where said tourist comes from. You might counter that this will shut out low-impact tourists in favour of the kind of people who rent he- licopters to fly to an active lava field and dance to Duran Duran on Instagram. But hear me out here. Yes, charging, say, €5,000 for a single tourist visa would slightly limit the abil- ity for some people to visit Iceland. But for every poshie who docks their yacht at Reykjavík harbour, we'll be prevent- ing hundreds of others who would only come here to buy plastic Viking helmets and take the exact same photo of Hall- grímskirkja that everyone takes. Further, rich people don't like to mingle with the unwashed masses, so we commoners would likely never even see them. Puffin shops are a scourge, repre- senting the worst impulses of petite bourgeoisie tourism. We can put a stop to it, though—with a hefty cover charge. SHARE: gpv.is/puffinz Photo: Jóhanna Pétursdóttir A woman A woman wanders between pubs, accepting drinks from men at the bar. She thanks them for their contribution to bridging the gender wage gap, and says good-bye. A POEM BY is curated by Grapevine’s poetry liaison, Jón Örn Loðmfjörð A Poem By Eydís Blöndal The Reykjavík Grapevine Issue 5 — 2016 6 12 17_th 6 ≈ 2.100.000,00 kr.

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