65° - 01.09.1967, Blaðsíða 33

65° - 01.09.1967, Blaðsíða 33
size being sufficient to feed thousands of potential breeders, we Jupiterians prove our superior ef- ficiency in this way as well. That we are masters of the Universe is fitting and desirable, but it seems to me, as a result of my short visit to Earth, that our remote-control system of repro- duction, necessitated by our dissimilar but highly evolved physical structure, might rob us of certain — sensations — which Earthlings possess. I men- tion this only in passing. ) The female of the species is roughly similar to the male but in no way rough, except sometimes in speech to males who are slightly different from the common Earthling male. Myself, in fact. (In biological communication between male and fe- male — a communication which is hard to re- search without actual participation — there are certain patterns of behaviour with which I was at first unfamiliar but which would have develop- ed had I been allowed even one more hour on Earth.) The female of the species is softer to the touch and eye than the male. Her scent is impossible to describe, but had we all noses, her scent would be found similar to that of the luscious purple flowers which grow in the red ridges of Jupiter. (It has since occurred to me that by contrast our sturdy breeders carry with them a scent more like that of the dust which covers most of our planet, but this is all by the way.) Another feature of Earthlings is hair. The fe- males possess quantities of it flowing from the tops of their heads. It is of a silken texture and grown for protection. Ha-ha. (By this levity I mean to emphasize that Earthlings have few brains worth protecting. As evidence of further misuse of their few advantages, it is interesting to observe that the males, who claim to possess the more valuabe brain, and hence should have more need for its protection, cut their hair short.) The hair colors of female Earthlings are un- natural to our eyes — although I have been told that redheads exist — but if one closes one eyes while feeling this odd colored hair, the reaction is not discomforting. I see that I have diverged from my story of the encounter with the farmer and his mate. I stated that I felt some uneasiness on meeting the mate, for having assimilated into myself the guise and O thinking of the farmer, a male, and being now in contact with the older female of the species, I was not sure I had correctly identified myself. Jupiterians, as we know, are divided into four categories: the non-sexual thinkers having mini- mal bodies and consisting almost entirely of an- tennae, the non-sexual laborers having vestigial antennae but several extra rows of paddle-crawl- ers and adequate bodies to support them, the breeders, who by Earth standards might be called females, and the Impregnators of the Red Cab- bage, of which we have and need only a few. You can imagine my confusion at this point. I was bred to be primarily a thinker but with sufficient body to execute my thoughts. On Jupi- ter I typify the professional planetary explorer, but am non-sexual in the Jupiterian and certainly in the Earthly sense. I hope I am making myself clear. When I saw the farmer’s mate pouring the fuel into containers and placing them on the surface at which one stokes onesself, I still believed that my physical identity on Earth ought to resemble the farmer’s more than hers, but I was not cer- tain. While concentrating on the essence of Yankee farmer, therefore, I pressed my IED but- ton to confirm identification, but it failed. I hasten to say that it was not the fault of the IED mechanism; I am sure it was the age of the farmer which caused the IED current’s weak res- ponse. At that moment, however, the female young of the couple appeared — the farmer’s daughter, and I discovered that my identity as a duplicated Earthling male was now firmly estab- lished. (My reasons for this astonishing certainty do not enter into this report, having no academic place. Also I hesitate to recount them until they have been more thoroughly examined, and for that I would need at least one more night on Earth.) Will the Planetary Exploration Committee please note this and give me priority for further Earth research? I repeat that it is vital that we have adequate data and that since I have already gained so much knowledge in this particular area of Earthling behaviour, it would be a waste of the Committee’s funds to send out an untried Jupiterian who would have to begin at the begin- ning- Continued, on page 34. 31 65



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