Reykjavík Grapevine - 29.07.2016, Blaðsíða 6

FOR
Fuck people.
I mean really. Is it not bad enough that
we are at this point most definitely caus-
ing the polar ice to shrink, depleting the
fragile climate of these majestic crea-
tures? Do we seriously need to be shoot-
ing them on sight, too?
It’s like, if I set your house on fire, and
then waited outside with a rifle to snipe
you as you ran screaming from your
burning home, you would rightly say I
am a monster. But for some reason, do-
ing effectively the same thing to a species
already on the verge of being endangered
is No Big Deal and the Sensible Choice.
Maybe shooting them with tranquil-
izer darts, bundling them up and air-
lifting them to Greenland or elsewhere
seems like a great expenditure. To my
mind, it’s the very least we can do, con-
sidering we’re playing a direct part in
causing them to be desperate enough to
swim to Iceland in the first place.
AGAINST
Fuck polar bears.

I mean really. Everyone has their gender-
neutral underwear in a twist over the fact
that we shot a polar bear, rather than cap-
turing it. We shoot them because they're
hungry carnivores and they eat people.
But we should rather capture them? And
do what? Put them in zoos? Don't we hate
zoos? Aren't zoos inhumane now?
OK, not zoos, so what then? Let's fly
them back to Greenland. Once they're
there, we'd have to helicopter them a few
hours away from the natives there, so
they don't eat them. Then they get hun-
gry, as they are these days, and get back
on an iceberg and float over here again.
And so it goes. Or we could shoot them.
Get it over with.
Ideally the next polar bear is captured
next to a poultry farm. One where the
cages are extra small to get your chicken
breasts under that sweet price point of
990 ISK per pack. Where the millions
spent on extending the misery of a starv-
ing polar bear would be put to better use
creating humane conditions for hun-
dreds of creatures. But no. Because mis-
ery is not counted in hours and lives, but
cuteness and fluffyness.
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WORD OF
THE ISSUE:
The word of this issue is firring. Origi-
nally, this was the Icelandic translation
of Karl Marx’s theory of alienation. To-
day, however, the word is used in col-
loquial Icelandic to describe not just
the alienation of the worker, but also
personal unrest and social isolation in
general.
Used in a sentence:
“Málflutningur Davíðs einkennist af
vænisýki, firringu og rógburði.” (“Davíð
[Oddson’s] remarks are characterised by
paranoia, alienation and defamation” - Jón
Trausti Reynisson, DV, February 2009.)
Firring
POEM
I saw you smiling,
bending over, looking at the
troll. I think to myself that this
will be over when you pull out
your phone and take a selfie
with your tourist wife.
A Poem By
Vigdís Ósk Howser
The Reykjavík Grapevine
Issue 11 — 2016
6
A POEM BY is curated by Grapevine’s
poetry liaison, Jón Örn Loðmfjörð
Number of bands who pledged
to quit the Merchants’ Week-
end festival in the Westman
Islands if authorities didn’t
change their policy on let-
ting local police issue a media
blackout on sexual assault
reporting during the festival.
7
Number of bands who stood
by that pledge, despite the
local police chief refusing to
change the policy.
Humane Treatment
Of Polar Bears?
FOR AND
AGAINST
0
5
∞
Number of things you could
be doing the first weekend of
August other than going to
the Westman Islands
The reported number of
sexual assaults at the festival
in 2015.
Arturo de Frias/Wikimedia Commons