Reykjavík Grapevine - 02.06.2017, Qupperneq 4

4The Reykjavík Grapevine
Issue 09 — 2017
The Top Stories
May 5 - May 18
Words: Paul Fontaine
Images: Sveinbjörn And His
Big Bag Of Stock Photos
The Prime-Minister pictured in Costco,
picking up his membership card.
NEWS IN BRIEF It‘s been a week
since Costco has opened its
doors to the Icelandic public and
news about its interesting prod-
ucts and appealingly low prices
are already shaking the country.
Some expect it to inject the com-
petition the local market needs,
while others are already conjur-
ing grim images of a hoarding so-
ciety. Reality, however, has so far
proven to be a little less sinister
than that. Perhaps hoping to avoid
the first-day traffic, Icelanders
have ironically been gathering en
masse in front of Costco during
the past week, lining up at the gas
dial with the eagerness of chil-
dren on Christmas day. Will the
curiosity kill the cat or will we
just be fine? Only time will tell.
We hear that Icelandic band Fox Train
Safari is really into trains.
If all goes well though, Costco
might soon find a new source of
revenue in the train line that’s
set to be built between Kefla-
vík Airport and Reykjavík in the
near future. A deal has in fact al-
ready been struck between mu-
nicipalities to make the trip to
Reykjavík city centre a little bit
more sustainable. The train will
run every fifteen minutes and will
be able to take around 2,400 pas-
sengers on a twenty-minute ride
to the city centre. The ticket, nat-
urally, is predicted to cost double
the price of a bus trip. We shall
just hope than when the train line
is being built Icelandic elves won’t
get any weird idea and mess with
the construction workers.
You're an elf yourself mr. Colbert.
… At least, that ’s the conclu-
sion you might come to if you
watch Stephen Colbert a little
too much. On a recent episode of
‘The Late Show’, Colbert revealed
to America and the world that
Icelanders do in fact believe in
elves and that their entire life
revolves around making con-
stant efforts not to piss them
off. It might be the first time
someone says this with relief, but
luckily Ricky Gervais was there to
help, chiming in with a dry, “They
don’t really.” What a champ.
The Mountain, in happier times
Despite Gervais’s efforts, every-
body’s favourite champ is still
Haf þór Júlíus Björnsson, aka
The Mountain. Hafþór, howev-
er, is not too happy with himself.
At his latest strength competi-
tion, in fact, The Mountain has
again fallen short of the title of
World’s Strongest Man. To say
Hafþór was disappointed would
be a euphemism. After all, this
was the seventh time he nearly
won the prize, with the difference
between him and Mr. Eddie Hall
amounting to one single point.
Hafþór called it a pathetic out-
come and has been wondering
about the meaning of life during
his daily chest lifts ever since.
Buckle up Hafþór, rumour has it
the government will stamp you
and your biceps on the 20,000kr
bill when you win the title. Have
we cheered you up?
SMJÖRFLUGA
An artist's rendering of a train in iceland. In this scenario both the train type and the
location would be chosen last minute seemingly at random to work together in a
photoshop combined picture. In other words, kind of like how planning is in Iceland.
First
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