65° - 01.09.1967, Qupperneq 25

16. Most Reykjavikans met their mates at a
dance or party.
17. Reykjavikans rarely confide in their wives
about their jobs, but usually great respect exists
between the couple. Also Reykjavikans confide
only partly or very little in their parents.
18. Reykjavikans prefer to get married by a
minister at his home for two reasons: a) they are
reluctant to have any “fuss” around their mar-
riage, and b) the woman is usually pregnant
when she gets married or has a child beforehand,
and hence she is “ashamed” at being married in
church. This is a very interesting thing since most
respondents said they hardly ever go to church
except at funerals, marriages, baptisms, confirma-
tions, and at Christmas. They do not get married
by a minister for any religious reason, but be-
cause it is the custom, and it seems to them to be
more beautiful.
19. Men tend to decide matters that concern
the family as a whole, make the financial budget,
take the initiative in the sexual relations of the
spouses and are usually more culturally orientated
and more outgoing. Women, on the other hand,
seem to take more care of the children, are usual-
ly more religious and take greater concern in
their childrens’ education.
20. It doesn’t matter whether someone is illegi-
timately born or not. Unwed mothers are not
looked down on, only considered unfortunate,
nor is a man stigmatized for fathering illegitimate
children. Nevertheless, there is a stigma on one
brought up as an only child vs. one who has been
brought up with other siblings.
21. Reykjavikans do not accept abortions and
also frown upon giving away children, although
most people would take a child. Neither do they
think it wise for a girl to get married or engaged
just because she is pregnant.
22. The younger generation is apparently going
to bring up its children more strictly than the
older has done. They, for instance, would not
allow their daughter to go camping alone with a
boy if she weren’t engaged, though the older
generation would allow her to.
23. Knowledge about sex comes to Reykj avxkans
mainly from books and poems, very rarely from
their parents, but the younger generation is deter-
mined to teach its children the facts of life.
24. Most if not all Reykjavik men have sexual
intercourse with a girl for the first time for the
sense of adventure. About one third of the women
reported that their first man was someone they
loved, but two thirds felt only curiosity and ad-
venture. Most men had only known their first
“woman” a day or two.
25. Although the sex life of most married coup-
les is rated only “fairly enjoyable”, most people
considered sex the most important part of their
marriage. This, one can understand, since most
men are seldom at home except at night.
26. Most married couples seem fairly well-
adjusted sexually although most report that the
man has greater interest in sexual relations, that
he is very often opposed to the wife initiating sex,
and that the wife seldom resents the husband
initiating relations.
27. In spite of much talk, adultery does not
appear to be very common. Nevertheless, it ap-
pears that people associated with commerce are
more likely to commit adultery than those who
are not.
28. Despite increased knowledge about contra-
ceptives, it would seem that 30—40% of all mar-
ried women do not use them.
29. Teenagers begin to copulate at 15 or 16.
30. Young Reykjavikans become entirely inde-
pendent at 15—17.
31. Most Reykjavik husbands kiss their wives
daily, but most said it was habit, not love.
32. Although most consider it necessary or
ideal that the spouses have like intelligence, it
appears that most couples are of unequal intel-
ligence.
33. Divorces “run” in families, i.e. if a person
is divorced, it is very likely that someone in his
closest family is also divorced. People who rate
their marriages “rather happy” or above, usually
do not have kin who are divorced, but those rated
below usually have some divorced kinfolk.
34. Most marriages in Reykjavik are “reason-
ably happy” with no tremendous love, no hatred,
but a 50—50 existence.
35. The six main things causing unhappiness
in family life are in order of importance: a)
money problems b) differences in the use of spare
time (dissimilar interests) c) the husband works
too much on the new house d) egoism e) alco-
holism 6) adultery.
36. Reykjavikans feel that parents should lend
money to their children for education although
they can afford to give it to them.
37. The ideal husband should have the follow-
ing characteristics: a) be relable and trustworthy
b) not be a drunkard c) sexually pleasing d)
respect the wishes of others e) have some money.
65
23