The Icelandic connection - 01.06.2010, Page 42

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ICELANDIC CONNECTION
Vol. 63 #1
Llama Escape
A day in the life & the great escape
by Connie Geller
The school bus had just left. I was sitting
in my farm kitchen here in southern
Saskatchewan, reveling in the solitude, read-
ing the newspaper, in my scungy housecoat
when the doorbell rang.
The dogs started barking, ALL FIVE of
THEM! Standing at the door is this lady,
beautifully turned out in an 'Haute Couture'
outfit. She informs me that she is terrified of
dogs, gives me the once over, and starts back-
ing away from me like I have a suppurating
disease on my face. As she is backing away
she says very timidly "I think that your llamas
have escaped. There are three llamas on the
road east of the elevator." And with that she
scurries back to her car. I didn't even get to
thank her much less get her name. You may
have guessed, I was mortified!
I ran and got dressed in my well coordi-
nated outfit (ancient jeans, older sweatshirt
and a prehistoric jacket) tore out to the barn
for some grain for luring (bait) and headed
down the road, talking to myself. After I had
walked for about two miles and decided that I
was on a fools errand (did I mention that it
had started to pour?) I caught a glimpse of
movement in the middle of a field. Sure
enough there were three of our yearling lla-
mas - Canadian Ice, Hallmark and
Windstorm, happily grazing away on some
farmers crop!
Ha! Ha! All is not lost! but how am I ever
going to get them out of there and home?
(Still talking to myself!). Well there was noth-
ing for it but to try 'the old white bucket ploy.'
I held the white bucket over my head, shook
the grain and called at the top of my voice
'Llamallamallama'. They looked up,
"Mommeee!" They came running!... Hey, this
isn't going to be too bad.(Talking to myself,
again) The first thing I tried, worked. "UH,
HUH" I had temporarily lost my head ... and
clean forgot that I still had to walk about two
miles back on the road. ...Well the road
seemed like a good idea! Nice easy walking -
until the first car came along.
Whoosh! Back into the field. Did you
know that a young llama can do a standing
broad jump of about eight feet!
"Lllamma llamallamallama" 'shaka',
'shake', 'shake'! "Come on Stormy, come to
Momma". AH, Ha! it's working (talking to
myself again!) Back off the field - up out of
the ditch in ankle deep water (it's raining
remember) and BACK onto the road.
SLOW LEARNER, what can I say?
I had managed about a hundred yards
when a diesel truck came along in the oppo-
site direction from us.
He was very polite and slowed right
down, however - "Mommee, this is really
scary!!" The llamas turned around in front of
the truck and took off full tilt down the road
AWAY from home. For a moment I chased
after them. Yeah, that is really smart - now
they are running away from me AND the
truck!
I went back to the trucker and said, "If
you will just stop for a moment maybe I can
get them into this field."
Yes, I said that! It was the field or a merry
chase to the next town.
"Okay", he says. "I'd get out and help you
but I am in a real hurry..."
"Oh, that's okay, thanks anyway," say I,
...who knows darn well that another body,
ANY other body would be a huge help!
"Lllamma,llamallamallama," shaka
shake shake. You could just see those little
guys thinking.
"Wait a minute we have fallen for this
before. There is probably something a lot bet-