Jón á Bægisá - 01.11.2008, Page 134

Jonathan Swift — Jóhanna Gunnlaugsdóttir
the time of their pregnancy, as they are now of their mares in foal, their
cows in calf, or sow when they are ready to farrow; nor offer to beat or
kick them (as is too frequent a practice) for fear of a miscarriage.
27. Many other advantages might be enumerated. For instance, the addition
of some thousand carcasses in our exportation of barreld beef: the prop-
agation of swine’s flesh, and improvement in the art of making good
bacon, so much wanted among us by the great destruction of pigs, too
frequent at our tables; which are no way comparable in taste or magnifi-
cence to a well grown, fat yearly child, which roasted whole will make a
considerable figure at a Lord Mayor’s feast, or any other publick enter-
tainment. But this, and many others, I omit, being studious of brevity.
28. Supposing that one thousand families in this city, would be constant
customers for infants flesh, besides others who might have it at merry
meetings, particularly at weddings and christenings, I compute that
Dublin would take off annually about twenty thousand carcasses; and
the rest of the kingdom (where probably they will be sold somewhat
cheaper) the remaining eighty thousand.
29. I can think of no one objection, that will possibly be raised against
this proposal, unless it should be urged, that the number of people
will be thereby much lessened in the kingdom. This I freely own,
and ‘twas indeed one principal design in offering it to the world. I
desire the reader will observe, that I calculate my remedy for this one
individual Kingdom of Ireland, and for no other that ever was, is, or,
I think, ever can be upon Earth. Therefore let no man talk to me of
other expedients: Of taxing our absentees at five shillings a pound:
Of using neither cloaths, nor houshold furniture, except what is of
our own growth and manufacture: Of utterly rejecting the materials
and instruments that promote foreign luxury: Of curing the expen-
siveness of pride, vanity, idleness, and gaming in our women: Of in-
troducing a vein of parsimony, prudence and temperance: Of learn-
ing to love our country, wherein we differ even from Laplanders,
and the inhabitants of Topinamboo: Of quitting our animosities and
factions, nor acting any longer like the Jews, who were murdering
one another at the very moment their city was taken: Of being a
little cautious not to sell our country and consciences for nothing:
Of teaching landlords to have at least one degree of mercy towards
their tenants. Lastly, of putting a spirit of honesty, industry, and skill
into our shop-keepers, who, if a resolution could now be taken to
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á- .ýSœp/iiá - Tímarit um þýðingar nr. 12 / 2008