Leyfi til að elska - mar. 2023, Blaðsíða 37

Poustie et al. 13
Anyone, male or female, can be an alienator—I pity them, for they are ill and
do not know it. Their psychological wounds are so very deep, yet they will not
acknowledge them . . .
Many statements suggested that targeted parents often view the process of
parental alienation as a behavioral manifestation of personality and psycho-
social troubles in the alienating parent. The frequency with which narcissism
was mentioned is particularly noteworthy. Given the complex interpersonal
aspects of parental alienation, family violence was identified as a theme.
Family Violence
There were 85 references in the data coded at this theme, and three subthemes
were identified.
Parental Alienation Is Child Abuse. A large number of references were made to
the notion that causing parental alienation through the use of alienating
behaviors is child abuse. Overall, 53 of the 126 targeted parents directly
referred to it. Concerns that alienating behaviors are emotionally abusive
were raised.
Introducing false fears to an alienated child to keep a child away from parents
is abuse. No one has the right to mess with a child’s head. It’s wrong and needs
to stop.
Intimate Partner Violence. Some targeted parents reflected on a history of inti-
mate partner violence with their ex-spouse. Often these comments appeared
to enable the targeted parent to remember their need to flee their ex even
though it triggered alienation.
I was in a verbally, physically and emotionally abusive marriage for 18 years
before I made the final decision to divorce the father of my children.
Allegations. Various targeted parents indicated that they had been on the
receiving end of false allegations of domestic violence—accusations of
which established or exacerbated the alienation.
He applied for a Domestic Violence Order (unfounded) to keep me from
contacting them. It took 6 months to get a court hearing, in the meantime [the]
judge ordered a temporary DVO which he put on both boys’ school files. [The]
DVO application was dropped 2 weeks before court, but the damage was done.
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GLEYMDA FORELDRIÐ: FORELDRAÚTILOKUN FRÁ SJÓNARHÓLI ÚTSETTA FORELDRISINS CLARE POUSTIE O.FL.